The 5 Love Languages

Have you heard of the 5 Love Languages? The 5 Love Languages is a tool to enrich your life and your relationship with your loved ones. If you don't know what your love language is take this quiz and encourage your loved ones to take it.

Once you know what your love language is you'll be able to tell your loved ones what it is that makes you feel loved.

My love language is Quality Time with Physical Touch as a close second. I appreciate when people do acts of service for me or compliment me but those don't make me feel as loved as quality time and physical touch.

Because I love and understand those 2 languages they're easy for me to give. The problem is everyone is different. My husband's language is Words of Affirmation. That love language is the hardest one for me to give, it just doesn't come naturally so I have to work extra hard to make sure he feels loved. I list out actions I've taken to express words of affirmation to my husband in this post.

Here is a breakdown of the 5 Love Languages:

Words of Affirmation

How to communicate: Encourage, affirm, appreciate, empathize.

Actions to take: Send an unexpected note, text, or card. Encourage genuinely and often.

Avoid: Non-constructive criticism, not recognizing or appreciating effort.

Physical Touch

How to communicate: Non-verbal – use body language and touch to emphasize love.

Actions to take: Hug, kiss, hold hands, show physical affection regularly. Make intimacy a thoughtful priority.

Avoid: Physical neglect, long stints without intimacy, receiving affection coldly.

Receiving Gifts

How to communicate: Thoughtfulness, make your spouse a priority, speak purposefully.

Actions to take: Give gestures and gifts thoughtfully, with and without special occasion. Even small things matter in a big way. Express gratitude when you’re given a gift.

Avoid: Forgetting special occasions.

Quality Time

How to communicate: Uninterrupted and focused conversations. One-on-one time is critical.

Actions to take: Create special moments together, take walks and do small things with your spouse. Weekend getaways are huge.

Avoid: Distractions when spending time together, long stints without focused one-on-one time.

Acts of Service

How to communicate: Use action phrases like “I will” and “I’ll help…”. They want to know you’re with them, partnered with them.

Actions to take: Do chores together or make them breakfast in bed. Go out of your way to help alleviate their daily workload.

Avoid: Making the requests of others a higher priority, lacking follow-through on tasks.

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Knowing what makes up each Love Language makes it easier to tell what language people like to give and helps you learn what their language is.

For instance, my dad likes to do acts of service, it's a way for him to feel needed and important, but he gets discouraged and grumpy if no one recognizes his efforts with words of affirmation. I like to people watch and figure people out so this is a fun brain activity for me :)

Its important to know the love language of yourself, your Significant Other, friends, and family, it's a great tool to use with kids too. Kids' language may change as they get older so be on the look out to ensure you're making them feel loved through the language they need most.

Good luck speaking the 5 languages of love :)